BEEN BLINGIN'

2000 miles above the earth. Location: in a space station. Two sexy ladies make out in zero-gravity in front of a tall, handsome man in a fur suit. He is MAXOTIP DOLLAR MONEY RAP, the world's most famous rapper. Smiling, he grabs a handful of cocaine and tosses it into air, then leaps into the hovering zero-g blow-cloud it forms.

MAXOTIP
Hell yeah. I'm gonna snort space coke while you bitches french.

SEXY LADY ONE
Oh hell yeah.

SEXY LADY TWO
I'm not happy that you just called me a bitch, but I'm very happy that you took me up to your orbiting space pimp pad, Maxotip Dollar Money Rap.

MAXOTIP
Then get frenching, Missy!!

The girls go back to frenching and Maxotip snorts floating blow and takes a big sip from a bottle of Courvoisier.

MAXOTIP
Yo I'm a billionaire.
And I'm tired of seeing those dumb ass squares.
Rap has made me the richest player in the game
And now that I bought a space house things will never be the same!

The sexy ladies turn to Maxotip.

SEXY LADY TWO
Wow. Was that freestyle?

MAXOTIP
You know it was, lady.

SEXY LADY ONE
That reminds me-- Don't you have a big concert tonight?

Maxotip looks at his large watch, which is carved from a single diamond.

MAXOTIP:
Shit-- I'm gonna be late! Watch out!

Maxotip kicks off the wall and floats toward a door marked "Escape Pod."

SEXY LADY ONE
Don't take the escape Pod, Maxotip! It's never been tested!

SEXY LADY TWO
Your space H2 Limousine can be here in ten minutes.

Maxotip looks them both in the eyes.

MAXOTIP
Yeah-- but I go on in fifteen. I've never been late to one of my many rap performances and I'm not going to start today.

Maxotip slaps the red button and the escape pod door opens. He enters and the door slams shut behind him.

Exterior of the space station. An escape pod shaped like an automatic handgun launches out of the space ship, appearing to shoot its way out. It turns toward earth.

Interior of the escape pod. Maxotip looks at his watch again then drinks from another, different bottle of Courvoisier.

MAXOTIP
Damn it!

Inside the space ship the Sexy Ladies look at each other.

SEXY LADY ONE
I hope he makes it.

SEXY LADY TWO
I don't. And just so you know, there's no way he will.

SEXY LADY ONE
What!?

Sexy lady two draws a switchblade from her ugg boot and flicks it open.

SEXY LADY TWO
Maxotip Dollar Money Rap made a lot of enemies becoming the richest man on earth and by far the best rapper. Today, he gets his! And I'm sorry, but you get yours too!

Sexy lady two launches at Sexy Lady One, but Sexy Lady One manages to dodge just in time.

SEXY LADY ONE
What have you done?

SEXY LADY TWO
Enough talk!

Sexy Lady Two lunges at Sexy Lady One again, but this time Sexy Lady One is ready for her. Sexy Lady Two manages to cut Sexy Lady One's arm real bad, but Sexy Lady One throws Sexy Lady Two hard against the giant solid gold statue of a microphone in the corner. She lands on her switchblade and it goes right through her stomach. Her blood begins pouring out into the air.

SEXY LADY ONE
What have you done!

SEXY LADY TWO
Hahahaha.....

SEXY LADY ONE
Answer me!!!

Sexy Lady Two dies.

SEXY LADY ONE
Damn you!

Back to the exterior of the gun escape pod. As it enters the atmosphere it begins it begins to turn red with heat. Inside, Maxotip Dollar Money Rap works desperately at the controls.

MAXOTIP
Sabotage! I'll never make the show now! Or at least not on time.

Just then the escape pod crash lands onto a deserted tropical island. Kablammo! Slowly, the "clip" slides out of the gun-shaped escape pod. Maxotip is nestled inside adorably, unconscious.

Night falls on the unconscious Maxotip. Suddenly he awakes and looks around.

MAXOTIP
What! A deserted tropical island! Now who's gonna listen to my rap songs!

TO BE CONTINUED