A double-decker bus goes by.
A furious man wearing a kid rock t-shirt enters the frame. His nose has been bleeding, part of his ear is bitten off, and his long filthy hair hangs limply around his face. He stares directly into the camera.
FURIOUS MAN (cockney)
Right.
Without taking his eyes off the camera the furious man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a large firecracker and a lighter. He lights the fuse, then closes his fist around the firework and holds his hand out to his side. The fuse gets shorter and shorter but still he does not take his eye off the camera. He begins to take rapid deep breaths as the spark gets to the end of the fuse. As the firework goes off with a sickening BANG and his hand explodes in bone and blood, he shouts, still looking down the lens.
FURIOUS MAN
SPICE WORLD TWO!!!
The mortal combat music begins. So does a long montage. In this montage we not only see the events of spice world one, but all the real life events that have taken place since the pinnacle of Girl Power, including but not limited to: Posh getting married to David Beckham, Scary having sex with Eddie Murphy and bearing his child, Baby recording the song "(Hey You) Free Up Your Mind" for the anime film Pokemon: The First Movie, Ginger recording her best solo album "Scream if You Want to Go Faster," and Sporty slutting around like a fucking whore all over the united Kingdom. Finally we start seeing Montage clips that indicate they are all going to go the mall, and the montage ends with all of them bumping into each other at the mall.
POSH:
Well, that's what I call "Girl Power."
MEATLOAF
I'll drive the bus.
BABY
Well then, lets do it! Spice world reunion tour!
ALL
Girl Power!
The remainder of the movie is basically a rehash of the first Spice World movie, with pretty much the exact same dialogue except for various asides explaining why all the Spice Girls are now so fat and old.
Welcome to England, you dumb asshole
2 comments:
Stephen - an idea is presented.
Man: Hey woman, you came from my rib.
Woman: But I became so much more.
Man: You did. Now that you can work and vote and bring home money and have kids, I'm less important.
Woman: Who's the rib, now?
Man: I am. I am but a rib.
Woman: Exactly.
Man: The roles have been revearsed, and now I serve in servitude, knowing that my existence is trivial and but a whim of women.
Woman: You're here because I let you be here.
Man: So what of us? What of men? Where do we go now?
(Later in the movie, the men unite and steal a rib from a woman, and they use that rib to make a new sex, one that they call "twomen." The new sex cannot vote or work or do anything except have children. With twomen, the men are no longer second bananas as they are obviously superior. In addition, since men are no longer dependent on women, become less in vogue. By the time the movie ends, there are 3 sexes, and two and 1/10 of them like men. Because of this ratio and the lack of available men, even the ugliest men are never lonely, and they get to date the cutest girl they can find.)
Hello-
I enjoyed the first Spice Girls movie, and I do think the time is ripe for another, but this seems repetitive. Also, I found myself genuinely concerned about the labels you used for this screenplay, namely, "Finally a movie where Elton John dies." Did you know that without Elton John, there would be no "Rocketman"? There would be no "Tiny Dancer," no "Island Girl," no "Have You Seen the Love Tonight," and no duet with "Eminem." Frankly, your adjective "Finally" is offensive. He's a singer who has been around a long time, and thus deserves respect. He is homosexual. If, in your Spice World sequel, Elton John truly needs to die to advance the storyline, I feel a more appropriate label would be "Unfortunately, a movie where Elton John dies." He also sang "Crocodile Rock," a song. I'm not trying to rag on you here, but I would like you to recognize that even though he's from the United Kingdom, Elton John has influenced America to the point that it's amazing. Thanks for your time and letting me vent. Other than this issue, good job and keep up the good work.
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