INT. MOSTLY EMPTY MUSEUM OF HATS
MIKEY: Dude man-- this museum of hats is the queen of boring!
JEFFY: (Laughs) It sure is homey
MIKEY: Like look at this ridiculous black top hat!
CLOSE UP of hat. ominous music. Is that a blood stain, there, on the brim?
JEFFY: Can you believe people used to wear this? Man, everyone from the past sucked it so hard.
MIKEY removes his TKE fisherman hat.
MIKEY: Yo, Jeffy, I got an idea.
JEFFY: Oh no!
MIKEY: Man, the guys back at the house wouldn't believe it.
JEFFY: Do it man.
MIKEY switches his TKE fish hat with the top hat on top of the evil looking wax figure.
JEFFY: Let's get out of here!
MIKEY stuffs the tall top hat in MIKE'S Backpack.
EXT. MUSEUM OF FAMOUS HATS-- DAY.
We see the two youths leaving the museum, laughing.
EXT. LONDON STREETS-- DAY.
The two men walk around, seeing various LONDON sights.
EXT. BIG BEN.--SUNSET.
MIKEY: Jeffy, man, I don't feel so good.
JEFFY: I told you not to eat that Shephards Pie shit.
MIKEY: Seriously, dude.
JEFFY: Hold on.
JEFFY touches MIKEY'S forehead with the back of his hand. It is EXTREMELY HOMO-EROTIC.
JEFFY: You're a little hot, Mikey.
MIKEY: How would you know, gaybag? Let's hit the pharmacy and get a thermometer.
JEFFY: Fine, gaylord.
INT: HOSTEL ROOM--- NIGHT
MIKEY has a thermometer in his mouth. He's still wearing that hat.
MIKEY: Dude, I feel like shit.
JEFFY: Less talking and more thermometer sucking. You should know how to suck it!
MIKEY: Shut up. I would not.
JEFFY take the thermometer from MIKEY's mouth in a wierdly homeorotic way. He turns it in the light.
JEFFY: Shit-- this is in centigrade.
MIKEY: Fuck it. We'll be back at MNU tomorrow night. I'm sure I'll be fine.
JEFFY: FINELY GAY.
MIKEY: SHUT UP!
JEFFY: Geez.
MIKEY: Let's go to sleep.
INT. HOSTEL ROOM-- LATER.
We see MIKEY and JEFFY asleep in their separate beds. MIKEY is still wearing the hat. SUDDENLY Mikes eyes open. HE LOOKS CRAZY. He grabs the thermometer from earlier, and USING ONLY THE STRENGTH OF HIS OWN TWO ARMS, he breaks it in half. Looking crazy, he poors the mercury inside into his open mouth. He looks over at JEFFY, scarily, and pulls out a swiss army knife from his open backpack.
INT. AIRPORT-- DAY.
MIKEY walks through the airport. He is noticeably both alone and still wearing the DEATH HAT.
{more later. Comments are welcome-- who's the next victim?!?!}
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